If Men Could Menstruate

Highlight of my day in Journalism 371: Women, Men, & Media.

If Men Could Menstruate
by Gloria Steinem

A white minority of the world has spent centuries conning us into thinking that a white skin makes people superior - even though the only thing it really does is make the more subject to ultraviolet rays and to wrinkles. Male human beings have built whole cultures around the idea that penis envy is "natural" to women - though having such an unprotected organ might be said to make men vulnerable, and the power to give birth makes womb envy at least as logical.

In short, the characteristics of the powerful, whatever they may be, are thought to be better than the characteristics of the powerless - and logic has nothing to do with it.

What would happen, for instance, if suddenly, magically, men could menstruate and women could not?

The answer is clear - menstruation would become an enviable, boast-worthy, masculine event:

Men would brag about how long and how much.

Boys would mark the onset of menses, that longed-for proof of manhood, with religious ritual and stag parties.

Congress would fund a National Institute of Dysmenorrhea to help stamp out monthly discomforts.

Sanitary supplies would be federally funded and free. (Of course, some men would still pay for the prestige of commercial brands such as John Wayne Tampons, Muhammad Ali's Rope-a-dope Pads, Joe Namath Jock Shields - "For Those Light Bachelor Days," and Robert "Baretta" Blake Maxi-Pads.)

Military men, right-wing politicians, and religious fundamentalists would cite menstruation ("men-struation") as proof that only men could serve in the Army ("you have to give blood to take blood"), occupy political office ("can women be aggressive without that steadfast cycle governed by the planet Mars?"), be priest and ministers ("how could a woman give her blood for our sins?") or rabbis ("without the monthly loss of impurities, women remain unclean").

Male radicals, left-wing politicians, mystics, however, would insist that women are equal, just different, and that any woman could enter their ranks if she were willing to self-inflict a major wound every month ("you MUST give blood for the revolution"), recognize the preeminence of menstrual issues, or subordinate her selfness to all men in their Cycle of Enlightenment. Street guys would brag ("I'm a three pad man") or answer praise from a buddy ("Man, you lookin' good!") by giving fives and saying, "Yeah, man, I'm on the rag!" TV shows would treat the subject at length. ("Happy Days": Richie and Potsie try to convince Fonzie that he is still "The Fonz," though he has missed two periods in a row.) So would newspapers. (SHARK SCARE THREATENS MENSTRUATING MEN. JUDGE CITES MONTHLY STRESS IN PARDONING RAPIST.) And movies. (Newman and Redford in "Blood Brothers"!)

Men would convince women that intercourse was more pleasurable at "that time of the month." Lesbians would be said to fear blood and therefore life itself - though probably only because they needed a good menstruating man.

Of course, male intellectuals would offer the most moral and logical arguments. How could a woman master any discipline that demanded a sense of time, space, mathematics, or measurement, for instance, without that in-built gift for measuring the cycles of the moon and planets - and thus for measuring anything at all? In the rarefied fields of philosophy and religion, could women compensate for missing the rhythm of the universe? Or for their lack of symbolic death-and-resurrection every month?

Liberal males in every field would try to be kind: the fact that "these people" have no gift for measuring life or connecting to the universe, the liberals would explain, should be punishment enough.

And how would women be trained to react? One can imagine traditional women agreeing to all arguments with a staunch and smiling masochism. ("The ERA would force housewives to wound themselves every month": Phyllis Schlafly. "Your husband's blood is as sacred as that of Jesus - and so sexy, too!": Marabel Morgan.) Reformers and Queen Bees would try to imitate men, and pretend to have a monthly cycle. All feminists would explain endlessly that men, too, needed to be liberated from the false idea of Martian aggressiveness, just as women needed to escape the bonds of menses envy. Radical feminist would add that the oppression of the nonmenstrual was the pattern for all other oppressions ("Vampires were our first freedom fighters!") Cultural feminists would develop a bloodless imagery in art and literature. Socialist feminists would insist that only under capitalism would men be able to monopolize menstrual blood . . . .

In fact, if men could menstruate, the power justifications could probably go on forever.

If we let them.

And...go!

I should be reading about three different textbooks right now, but I'm waiting endlessly for washing machines to open up downstairs so I can wash my clothes and sheets...so I'm calling that an excuse for blogging.

I'm back up at CSUN (for those who didn't know), and actually quite excited to be so. It will be my final year - not only in Northridge, but in school PERIOD. That's it, two more semesters! I will be done and finished with all my required classes and work to received my Bachelor of Arts degree in Journalism come May 2011, and then freedom is just beyond the door.

I can't believe I'll be graduating college. I'll be the first woman in my direct family to receive a Bachelor's degree (I believe...?), and 18 years of schooling will finally be OVER. I'm beyond excited - I'm tripping out. It's enticing, the world out there. And I finally will be able to go experience it leash-free (well, except for the whole money part, of course).

I have finalized my plans to move to Europe (Netherlands) at the end of next summer, so about one year from now. I'll be living with Bjorn in Eindhoven and we're going to travel southern Europe at first - mainly Italy, Spain, and Greece - and then settle down. He has his job and I'm going to try to tutor/teach English at the local high schools. It will be a challenge, but I'm up for challenges. And I'll have him and his family for close support and comfort, so I know I'll be in good hands.

As for missing my family, friends, and home? I can't even fathom how much I will - I know it will be unbearably painful at times. But I have to do this - I NEED to. Since I was little, I've been a dreamer and my limit was beyond the sky. If I don't grab the bull by its horns and go face the world, throw myself out into the unknown and step out of my box, how will I ever grow up?? Moving to Northridge was the first step in that, and small as it was, it helped condition me to get accustomed to living away from my comfort zone and establishing my own routine.

Europe is a far bigger step, I know. But I'm not jumping in headfirst without a parachute, and I'm not hopping on a plane without any idea of what I'm doing. I'm prepared, I'm informed, I've got plenty of help. As far as being brave? Well, I definitely need to ask for help from the powers that be for that one. I know God will provide if I ask with my heart. But it's up to me to take the initiative.

Anyway, so that's the future - what's going on now?

Well, I love my new dorm. Love it. It's far more comfortable than last year - it feels like an actual home. We have a kitchen and hallways and general little things that one takes for granted, that make a place feel more like home than a hospital room. And I'm rooming with two of the same roommates as last year, since we all got along so well, and the fourth girl (who's new) is AWESOME. Very like me, actually: she loves 80's music and saving the planet and animals, and women's rights. So we have a lot to talk about. :)

This semester will be extremely busy for me, though, I can already tell. I have a job (returning from last year), so that's a HUGE plus - the whole money stress nightmare from last year will be absent this time around. But work Mon-Fri plus five classes (all a handful each) means it'll be nonstop, go, go, go until December. I think I'm ready though - I'm prepared to kick butt and get this done.

So that's the update for now - lots of exciting things on the horizon. Life is going pretty well right now, and I'm deeply grateful. Stability is precious, I've learned.

So here we go - let the final year commence!

What Do You Got?

You probably didn't know my favorite band is Bon Jovi, but well...it is.

And they just announced the other day that their second Greatest Hits collection will be out in November (read: cause for Bon Jovi fans everywhere to dance and celebrate), along with FOUR new tracks written and produced exclusively for the compilation!

It's an exciting time for we Jovi nuts.

Well this morning, the first of those four new tracks was released online and on radio airwaves - called "What Do You Got?"

It premiered at 7am EST, so I was still zonked in my bed. But before 9am PST, I had devoured the song 5 times, downloaded it to my hard drive, added it to my iPod, and practically memorized the lyrics.

It's all the talk on Twitter, Facebook, Bon Jovi boards, blogs...you name it. But I thought I'd post it here for the sake of sharing the lyrics - because Jon Bon Jovi and Richie Sambora are renowned for their lyrical talent, and this song is no exception.

Critics call it vanilla, boring, uncreative -- I call it classic Bon Jovi, traditional and true to what their music ALWAYS been and ALWAYS will be: feel-good, adrenaline-rushing love-and-life anthems. They get it. The average Joe and Mary can smile and nod because the song speaks to real life and gives them a sense of belonging, comfort, joy. And isn't that what music is all about?

What Do You Got

Everybody wants something, just a little more

We're makin' a living and what we're living for

Rich man or a poor man, a pawn or a king

You can live on the street, you can rule the whole world

But it don't mean one damn thing

What do you got if you ain't got love?

Whatever you got, it just ain't enough

You're walkin' a road but you're goin' nowhere

Tryin' to find your way home but there's no one there

Who do you hold in the dark of night?

You wanna give up but it's worth the fight

You can have all the things that you've been dreaming of

If you ain't got someone you're afraid to lose

Everybody needs just one someone to tell them the truth

Maybe I'm a dreamer but I still believe

I believe in hope, I believe that change can get us up off our knees

What do you got if you ain't got love?

Whatever you got just ain't enough

You're walkin' a road but you're goin' nowhere

Tryin' to find your way home but there's no one there

Who do you hold in the dark of night?

You wanna give up but it's worth the fight

You can have all the things that you've been dreaming of

If you ain't got love, it's all just keepin' score

If you ain't got love, what the hell we doin' it for?

I don't wanna have to talk about it

How many songs I gotta sing about it?

How long you gonna live without it?

Why does someone somewhere have to doubt it?

Someday you'll figure it out

What do you got if you ain't got love?

Whatever you got, it just ain't enough

You walk on that road but you're goin' nowhere

Tryin' to find your way home but there's no one there

Who do you hold in the dark of night?

You wanna give up but it's worth the fight

You can have all the things that you've been dreaming of

If you ain't got love, it's all just keepin' score

If you ain't got love, what the hell we doin' it for?

(Whoa oh oh oh) Ohh, what do you got if you ain't got love?

(Whoa oh oh oh) Ohh, what do you got if you ain't got love?

(Whoa oh oh oh) Ohh, what do you got if you ain't got love?

(Whoa oh oh oh)