Wednesday, July 27, 2011

"One Day You Will" (Lady Antebellum lyrics)

This is one of the most beautiful songs I've ever heard. It's so true and sad and inspiring and comforting all at once - in other words, real.

You feel like you're falling backwards
Like you're slippin' through the cracks
Like no one would even notice
If you left this town and never came back
You walk outside and all you see is rain
You look inside and all you feel is pain
And you can't see it now

But down the road the sun is shining
In every cloud there's a silver lining
Just keep holding on (just keep holding on)
And every heartache makes you stronger
But it won't be much longer
You'll find love, you'll find peace
And the you you're meant to be
I know right now that's not the way you feel
But one day you will

You wake up every morning and ask yourself
What am I doing here anyway
With the weight of all those disappointments
Whispering in your ear
You're just barely hanging by a thread
You wanna scream but you're down to your last breath
And you don't know it yet

But down the road the sun is shining
In every cloud there's a silver lining
Just keep holding on (just keep holding on)
And every heartache makes you stronger
But it won't be much longer
You'll find love, you'll find peace
And the you you're meant to be
I know right now that's not the way you feel
But one day you will

Find the strength to rise above
You will
Find just what you're made of, you're made of

But down the road the sun is shining
In every cloud there's a silver lining
Just keep holding on (just keep holding on)
And every heartache makes you stronger
But it won't be much longer
You'll find love, you'll find peace
And the you you're meant to be
I know right now that's not the way you feel
But one day you will

One day you will
Oh one day you will

Monday, July 25, 2011

Sugarland concert review: Rimac Field, UCSD (July 23, 2011)

Mom and I attended the Sugarland concert this past Saturday at Rimac Field on UCSD's campus in La Jolla. It was the first time either of us had seen them live, and we were equally excited. Despite it being general admission and standing room only, and being a country concert so half the people were drunk and stupid, we both enjoyed ourselves.

Obviously I can't speak for her, but here's my review!

We had a great spot, situated behind a family who had sprawled blankets and chairs out - so the chairs were a great decoy for me standing behind them (they prevented people from standing right in front of me) and the family used their blankets as territory so no one else could stand on them. Thus, we had a great open space between us and the rest of the packed crowd in front. I don't know how far back we were, but I really had no desire to fight the drunks up closer to the stage so I stayed put. We met up with a Jovi friend of mine (Marissa) and her friend Cyd, so we had company and someone to talk to while we waited.

After four hours of sitting, staking our claim, kicking crowd-crashers off our vantage point, and listening to openers Casey James and Sarah Bareilles, Jennifer Nettles and Kristian Bush FINALLY made an entrance on a stage ramp with the opening song, All We Are. (Which, by the way, is the PERFECT opening intro, and I had been hoping they'd use it!)

The electricity in the air was palpable: it was a beautiful, clear summer night, the band was full of energy, and Jennifer is one hell of a frontwoman. She has so much spunk and fire, and knows how to both seduce and rile up the crowd at all the right times. And she's FUNNY! Whether she was coyly flirting with the firemen who pulled their truck and ladder up to the fence at the perimeter of the field, or blowing kisses to a toddler in a cowboy hat sitting on his father's shoulders, she kept the crowd entertained, stimulated, and laughing.

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Kristian, while somewhat quiet in Jennifer's shadow, backs her up perfectly. He's a great musician, and has a beautiful voice - I LOVED when he performed the Incredible Machine interlude featured on the album. And he has gorgeous eyes! LOL I only noticed that for the first time during the show, when I was zooming in with my camera to get a headshot of him.

They played all their hits, with a nice balance of songs from their latest album (duh, it's the Incredible Machine TOUR) and previous albums: including my favorites Baby Girl and Something More. They engaged the audience and had us clapping, singing the choruses, harmonizing, etc.

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Halfway through the show, Jennifer mysteriously asked us if we liked surprises. Naturally the crowd roared, and she informed us that Kristian was giving his guitar away TO ONE OF US. I about keeled over. Unfortunately, we were too far back to even have a chance, so we watched as each of them signed the guitar in Sharpie right there on the stage, then looked around to find the lucky fan. Suspense built up as Kristian walked the length of the stage, from one side to another, until he finally hopped off and ventured deep into the crowd on the far left side, accompanied by security, and gave away that guitar.

The rest of us couldn't see him (although a spotlight indicated his location, lol), including Jennifer, who remained on stage and watched the big screen with us. When he returned, she interrogated him: "Well, was it special? I couldn't see it - we were trying to watch on the screen but we couldn't see ya." LOL it was so natural and casual, and not staged...it seems like a minor thing, but that really adds to the atmosphere of the show.

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When Kristian sang the interlude, Jennifer spray-painted the tour/album's slogan "LOVE" (with a peace sign in the 'O') on a huge white flag, then handed the flagpole to a little girl in the audience. I found out later that this was prearranged (the girl wasn't randomly selected right then) and she was led around the field, parading the flag through the audience. It was a really beautiful act - one of those concert moments you'll always remember.

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My favorite part of the show, however, came in the second half...during the transition from the previous song to the next, I thought I recognized the chords as a Bon Jovi song. I literally laughed to myself, thinking I was insane - you know you have a problem when you hear one band's music in another band's concert.

And then Kristian strummed his guitar, and there was no mistaking it...it WAS a Bon Jovi song. Well, one they wrote WITH Sugarland. ;) "Who Says You Can't Go Home", anyone? I about died.

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Now, let me clarify something: I actually hate that song. LOL. I have heard it live SO many freakin times that I literally groan when Bon Jovi plays it (and after 13 Jovi gigs, you'd get sick of it too.) When Jon starts his "It's all right! It's all right!" I want to throw a shoe up on stage.

But Saturday night was different. It was cool to bring a little Jovi into the Sugarland gig, and since they wrote it together it WAS fun to hear them perform it for once. And to top it all off, it's Mom's FAVORITE Bon Jovi song (and thus, Sugarland song), and since she'll probably never hear Jovi perform it live, I was so excited that she got to hear it that night. So I set aside my normal groans and protests of "It's NOT all right!" and danced/cheered more than I did during any other song.

Hey, I have to represent the Jovi love, ya know?!

The show was a bit short (about 1 hour 40 minutes) because of the campus curfew, which I expected, and since we had been standing or sitting on the ground for so long, my joints ached. And we had hardly eaten all day, so I was hungry AND sore, and the length of the show ended up being a good thing.

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All in all, I had a fantastic time and I DEFINITELY want to see them again. I especially love Jennifer's stage presence and contagious energy, but they all do a great job of engaging the crowd personally and doing much more than just singing and playing instruments. I felt like I was right on stage with Jennifer when she danced, strutted, and flirted, and calling attention to various parts of the crowd (the firemen, the little boy with the cowboy hat, the girl with the flagpole, and whoever got the guitar) is a fun way to unify us all.

Plus, this was my first concert with my new camera (Canon PowerShot SX30 IS), and thanks to Marissa's help with the manual settings, I am VERY happy with my photos.

Can't wait for the next show!


~

Here are a few videos from the show (not mine):




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And here are the rest of my pictures:

Shine the Light (Sugarland lyrics)

This is one of my favorite Sugarland songs - it is so beautiful and poignant, and lately the lyrics have really touched me. So I thought I'd share:

When you walk into the edge of those
Dark and lonely woods
And when I ask how was your day
And you answer "not so good"
And when nothing seems to be working out
Quite the way it should
I will shine the light

When the skies up above you fill
With grey and stormy clouds
And there's not a single face you know
In the maddening crowd
When you know that you don't make your way
But you just can't see how
I will shine the light

I will shine the light
I will shine the light
I will hold you in my arms
Until everything's alright
I will shine the light

When your worries, they won't let you sleep
And rob you of your days
And you've looked in all directions but
You still can't find your way
When you just need someone to remind you
That it's all gonna be okay
I will shine the light

I will shine the light
I will shine the light
When you're staring down your demons
Weighing in your darkest night
I will shine the light

Sometimes we jump into the great unknown
Sorrows we all will have to walk alone
Waiting there in the end
Is a heart that calls you a friend
That's me, clapping the loudest
Welcoming you home

So when your heart is heavy, like a stone
From carrying its load
And you look into the mirror
And see someone you don't know
When the shadows are closing in on you
Like a hand around your throat
I will shine the light
I will shine the light

When you've given in to your fears
When you've lost your will to fight
Let me know what I can do
Let me try to make it right
I will shine the light

I will shine the light


Tuesday, July 19, 2011

So, I graduated college.

If you are reading this and DON'T know that I graduated, please come out from under your rock. I'm actually late in posting this entry, because of several reasons:

1. I've been exhausted and lethargic, wanting to do nothing but play games on my new laptop.
2. I haven't really known what exactly to write.
3. I still can't believe I'm a college graduate.

But I, Rebecca Lyn Mahan, am indeed a college graduate. I finally completed the coursework for a Bachelor of Arts degree in Journalism at California State University, Northridge, and the pretty little diploma will arrive within 8 weeks. And I graduated with honors (cum laude).

It was a bit anticlimactic, graduating in the middle of summer. Most of my friends finished at the end of the proper quarter or semester term, so they celebrated before or around the month of May. My fellow Class of 2011 friends at CSUN walked in the ceremony they held in late May, of which I was not a part because I saw no reason to haul my family 150 miles up north at 8am to sit in the valley sun and listen to 800 other names they didn't know. I couldn't have cared less about the ceremony...until the morning of the ceremony. Then, sitting in my bedroom in San Marcos reading the happy messages from my fellow graduates, I was miserable. And I deeply regretted my choice.

So, I didn't walk. I think a part of me will always wish I had, but thankfully that's not the important part. The point is that I finished - and I finished strong.

It was a VERY difficult four years (+ summer term). As many of you know, I had quite a rough and tumble road to travel, battling debt and no job, car accidents, (minor) medical/health issues, school drama (administration/admissions and records battles), personal drama, and the constant homesickness and loneliness, missing everyone from my family to my friends to my boyfriend. Sometimes I look back on it now and wonder how the hell I survived.

The answer is simple: my family, my friends, my boyfriend, and my roommates. I NEVER could have done it without any of them...and yet, only my roommates were the ones physically there. My family kept me sane over the phone, my boyfriend over Skype, my friends when I saw them over summer and at Christmas, and my roommates while I was there. I'm a firm believer in love and social ties, and mine saved my life these last two years, especially.

I entered college as an excited and ambitious 18y-year-old, fresh out of high school. I couldn't wait to taste the adventures of college, dip my feet in the pools of experience. I was standing on the edge of a rooftop, waiting for the winds of adventure to pick me up...but first, I had to get ready. Two years went by relatively quickly, as I stayed at home and ventured no further than the city limits of my own hometown.

Then, as a 20-year-old, I took a leap and moved away from home to the northern valley of Los Angeles, in Northridge. My first time ever living away from home, and I struggled. I struggled a lot. I can't tell you how many tears there were, but the same can be said for laughs with the new and wonderful friends I made.

I worked hard. I took full loads of classes, studied hours on end, and practically lived in the library during the second half of my final semester. I maintained a minimum of a 3.5 GPA, and was selected as a member of Kappa Tau Alpha, the national journalism honor society.

My roommates all lived locally, so they went home almost every weekend. So I spent weekends alone up there, staying in my pajamas all day and sipping glasses of wine in front of a movie during the lonely nights. I locked myself in my room at bedtime and sometimes lie awake until the wee hours of the morning, either unnerved by being alone in the dorm, or annoyed by the constant noise around me: car alarms, screaming drunk students, music-playing neighbors, loud parties, and thumping upstairs, downstairs, and down the hall. I DO NOT miss those times.

I do miss my roommates and other friends, though. They kept me sane, and enriched my life in so many ways, with late-night talks or mid-morning cries, post-it notes with inside jokes taped all over our walls, spontaneous food runs, Hollywood adventures...or nights spent inside, watching My Big Redneck Wedding and laughing so hard we woke up with sore abs the next morning. I'll always look back on those times and smile.

But it's time to move on, I guess. As much as I love all those who entered my world in Northridge (and we will keep in touch!), my stay there was meant to end in July 2011. It was time to be done: move out of the dorms, submit the final projects, sign the papers, and walk off that campus once and for all...a college graduate.

Everything happened for a reason. I knew that, deep down, the whole time - but it was too damn hard to accept that fact when I was separated from everyone I loved and only wanted a hug from one of them. But my hard work paid off, and I finished.

Now life begins. It's strange, isn't it? During those two years, I felt like I was in a dark tunnel, and the light at the end was only a tiny speck of hope. It felt like it just stayed the same size, never getting closer. And every setback made the light look smaller. It felt like I was just standing still, and I'd never get to the end.

And now, here I am. Finally. Those tumultuous years are behind me, all the papers and tests and studying and STRESS are over. I closed my books for the final time. I am the proud owner of a Bachelor's degree.

Now, on to Europe. I'll be moving to the Netherlands to finally, finally live with Bjorn after nearly 5 years of being apart. I'll try to find a job teaching English, I'll get to travel and see far-off places, and I'll keep writing.

Everything I fantasized and dreamed about, everything I held close to my heart as reward for the stress and hard work I went through is finally happening. I'm standing on the edge of a rooftop; the wind is picking up.

I'll jump soon. And who knows where the wind will take me, but I'll enjoy the ride.